


romantic fantasies

by nightdecor



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Glowing Eyes, M/M, Song fic, joshler - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-28
Updated: 2016-07-28
Packaged: 2018-07-27 07:20:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7608940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nightdecor/pseuds/nightdecor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>a song fic based off of the song glowing eyes, this is my first finished fic so apologies for the bad writing, rushed ending and grammatical mistakes, and I hope you get where I fitted in the links to the song.</p>
            </blockquote>





	romantic fantasies

**Author's Note:**

> twitter: @nightdecor

**marriage**  
ˈmarɪdʒ/  
_noun_  
the legally or formally recognized union of a man and a woman (or, in some jurisdictions, two people of the same sex) as partners in a relationship.

no where in the definition of marriage does it mention the ability to be in love with someone other than your marriage partner, yet Tyler couldn't help but feel extremely more passion and deep affection for what seems to be his best friend. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't deny that not only the woman he married, but the whole female gender didn't entice him the way Joshua did.

Tyler lay in bed staring at Josh's hand as it dropped from the bunk above. "Josh" he whispered in his husky, sleepy voice. The patter of rain on the roof of the tour bus was the only reply. Tyler reached out and began tracing his finger around the creases on Josh's hand, admiring every inch. He pulled back quickly shaking his head. "You don't love him" he told himself over and over, but as much as he tried to resist he couldn't help but go back to travelling along Josh's hand with the tip of his finger. Images and memories of Josh began flooding Tyler's mind. The way his smile revealed his perfectly aligned teeth, The creases in his face that his smile created, the endless amount of shades and colours his hair had absorbed, even the smell of his favourite deodorant. Jenna seemed to be the furthest thing away from his thoughts lately, and as much as Tyler found his thoughts sinful, Josh would still manage to fill ever crevice of his brain like an infestation. Josh's eyes slowly opened and flickered like a lightbulb running out of energy, he felt a tingling feeling on his hand similar to pins and needles only in one specific place, moving in circular motions, and the sharpness of a nail along with it. he took quick short breath inwards in shock and pulled his hand inside his bunk. Tyler quickly pulled his hands in and closed his eyes. He felt eyes pin onto him as Josh checked below, revealing nothing but what seemed to be his sleeping friend, he then shook it off and lay down again. For the rest of the night Tyler stayed completely still as if turned to stone and kept his eye lids stuck together, tight enough to bruse eachother out of dismay of being caught, until finally drifting off to sleep into his own romantically fantasised world.

Tyler woke up to the sound of Josh's voice, the best way to be woken up, he smiled to himself and peered out of his bunk. A shirtless Josh looked over to him and smirked. "look who finally woke up". Tyler let out a sigh followed by a smile "big show today, i thought i'd get my rest" he said in a gravelly morning voice. Tyler looked forward to every show, not just because of the music or the room full of supporters, but for the moments where he could look over and see Josh doing what he loved with so much drive and energy. Shows were like an adventure, just for the both of them to share together, happily, never forgetting happiness. Tyler's definition of happiness was Josh. spending time with Josh, talking to Josh, laughing with Josh, always Josh.

Night fell quick after a breath taking show, Tyler climbed up on top of the stationed tourbus and lay gazing up at the star painted sky, trying to order the mess of thoughts zooming around his brain like electricity. The stars made him feel safe, as though they were a sort of company, listeners, guardians. He felt as though they were watching him, but in a protective, motherly way, less like his own mother. "Ty" a voice said from nearby, Tyler tilted his head sideways to reveal Josh climing up onto the roof. "what are you doing up here, dude?" he said, with a concerned feel to his voice. Tyler didnt even take in the question, the only thing he could focus on was the word "dude" something he usually passed off, but now seemed like a method of torture. He had never properly thought about Josh's feelings in the mids of trying to deny his own, yet a single word made everything so much more complicated. Before he knew it, Josh was laying beside him, He looked up at him with saddness in his eyes, watching him admire the beautiful sky, as he admired his whole world. Josh's mocha eyes were glowing, mimicking the stars above. "the sky is so decorative tonight" Josh whispered softly. "thats what we live for, Josh, the nights decor". They both lay in silence for a while as Tyler thought up the amount of things wrong with what he craved for, especially coming from a christian background, yet his hand began edging closer and closer to Josh's, as much as his brain told him not to he couldn't stop it. it edged closer along the cold metal surface until it finally made contact with his skin. Josh shot up as Tyler's stomach sank further than imaginable. "i- i- i didn't m-" Tyler was cut off. "i think i felt rain hit my head, sorry if i scared you" Josh laughed "we better go inside".

Tyler's thoughts began eating away at him more and more every day, the nights were even worse, all he had was his thoughts and the sound of the rain. "Josh" Tyler whispered as he poked his head upwards into Josh's bunk, "yeah" Josh said, both of their voices sounding more wide awake than they should. "have you ever thought about same sex relations ships" he asked shyly, "you know because their marriage has just been legalised and stuff", Josh looked at him confused "i mean i guess, but its so wrong" Tyler began rubbing his finger on the bed sheet out of anxiousness. "but what if it isn't, i mean they can't help their feelings" Josh sat up and lent on his arm. "you know as much as me, it goes against God, I've always been brought up to know it's not normal" Tylers heart shattered into a million peices, and he could feel every vein in his body turn cold. "but Josh, we're holding onto what we know about all of this, but maybe what we know we have to let go" Josh rubbed his eyes and let out a yawn, "everyone just has their own views on things, tyler". Tyler stayed quite for a while as he watched Josh lay back down and close his eyes. "i guess" he whispered and sunk back into his bed. All night he thought about Joshua's views, yet deep in his mind he still imagined a life were he could hold him and express his feelings. he traced over the tattoo on his right thigh of Josh's name as he thought about how his own name was perminently wrote on Josh's leg, like a mark of territory.

The last show of the tour finally came around. Tyler insides felt like they were almost unexistent, his mind had been eating away at him for months, He hardly spoke to his wife out of fear of leading her on even more or slipping up into the mess that was his emotions. Tyler and Josh both climbed their platforms in the audience, looking out to the arena filled with screaming supporters, they were in their happy place, Tyler even more so being able to watch Josh, shirtless, admiring the sheer success that filled the room, every night for the whole tour, when he could appear from behind his drumset and lose focus of what he was there for, just for a moment, he was taken aback so much so that he felt like he was dreaming, a feeling Tyler was all too familiar with.

On that platform everything felt slow, it felt like years of thought went by within seconds. Tyler thought about the many possibilities and turn outs of the actions that may lead. His mind began to race faster and faster, throwing ideas back and fourth. Everything just got out of hand until- "Fuck it" Tyler screamed, in his head of course. "i love you" he mimed, while drumming the beat to trees. Josh's eyebrows gave a confused gesture while his smile stayed just as big and gleaming. the song finished and the both of them hurried back to the stage to take a final bow. "I think I'm in love with you Josh, I can't deny it anymore" Tyler whispered into Josh's ear as they bowed. Every feeling he had been holding onto for months suddenly lifted from his chest, yet the pain of not knowing what might come next pierced through him like a sharp knife. The screams of the crowed seemed almost silent as Josh felt the whisper caress his ear drum. He felt a sudden drop in his stomach and his faced dropped like a feather made of lead. They both parted off stage. Josh didn't come back to the tourbus that night, he didn't come back to Tyler at all. The broken boy lay in the company of the rain and glowing stars, staring down at him.

Josh hadn't contacted him since the last show, he didnt even make eye contact with him after his confession. The moment that Tyler felt the most confident and fearless, was the moment that crushed him, the moment that sent him into a never ending tunnel of depression. weeks passed, Tyler lay awake every night wishing he had never spoke up, wishing he denyed his feelings. He itched away at his skin until it flaked off, hoping he wouldnt feel it, hoping it was just a nightmare. All he felt was emptiness, He had lost his wife, his best friend and his dignity. He hadn't felt the sun in a while, He felt he had no reason to leave his house, No reason to live. He replayed the memories with Josh over and over in slow motion. The happiness they shared on stage, The jokes, The laughing, The first time they met, The admiration of his perfectly carved face, The way he looked at him during interviews out of anxiousness. Tyler let out a wimper, a sigh and then nothing but emptiness as he lay in a dark room, far to dark.

Tyler suddenly woke up to the sound of a knock on the door and the birds chirping from the tree outside. He debated for a while if it was worth getting up for until the constant knocking got to much for him and he dragged himself across the dark, curtain protected room. When he finally reached the front door he let out a sigh and slowly opened it, letting the night seep in. A figure stoof in front of him with light highlighting the outline of their body. Before Tyler's eyes had a chance to adjust he felt soft hands cup his tear stained jaw. He closed his eyes out of shock and redemption hit his lips. He pulled away quickly to reveal a red haired boy gazing into his eyes. "josh?" he wimpered. Before he could get another word out their lips connected again, this time in a delicate way, like a sweet melody. Tyler couldn't help but smile into the kiss, he felt passion, love and remorse all at once, their fingers intertwined, Tyler felt Josh's palm once again, this time consentually. It felt like his broken mind was finally healing, piece by piece, kiss by kiss, it mended itself. Josh rubbed Tyler's arm, feeling every inch of his goosebumped skin like rain on a window. They both couldn't let go of eachother.

"I love you too." Josh whispered into Tylers ear.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you to mary (@treesjoshier) for helping me with the basic story line of the fic :)


End file.
